How I communicate

This week I did three surveys to determine the type of communicator that I am, and I had two other people, a coworker, and my husband also take the survey and give their input into what type of communicator that I am. For the communication anxiety survey I found that I scored at a 59 witch is at the higher end of the moderate level. My score "indicates that you feel somewhat concerned about a number of communication contexts, but probably not all. This mid-point level of communication anxiety is what we call situational". This surprised me because I do not like to speak in public, or even to be the main speaking in small group meetings. I thought my level of anxiety would be at a more elevated level. When my coworker, and my husband did this survey about me they had scores also in the moderate level, but with a lower score. Although they know I have anxiety about speaking in public, they feel that I am good at it, and do not feel that I have a super high anxiety about it.

Next I took the verbal aggressiveness survey. For this survey I scored a 56. I found many of the questions in this survey hard to answer so I answered the best I could with the options that were given. My score showed that I am in the mid range of the moderate level. This score indicates "you maintain a good balance between respect and consideration for others' viewpoints, and the ability to argue fairly by attacking the facts of a position rather than the person holding that position". This score also surprised me, and after reading the other descriptions of this survey I feel that I should have scored more at the low level that states "you are respectful of viewpoints and intelligence of others, and attempt to change their minds with gentle, inoffensive suggestions that do not attack their self-concept". When I read the scores of my husband's survey about myself in this area he scored me in the low level which as I stated before seems more appropriate. The score of my coworker's survey about me placed me in the none level, which I feel is very low, but I feel that it shows that I avoid any type of conflict in the work place, and I have only have a few times that I have had to engage in conflicts at work.

The third survey that I took was about listening styles. With this survey the results placed you into different groups. The groups are people oriented, action oriented, content oriented, and time oriented. My results placed me into group 1. I feel that this is very correct, but not how I strive to be, especially in the workplace. The description of the people oriented listening style is "you are empathetic and concerned with the emotions of others. This listening style helps you to build relationships, but it can interfere with proper judgment because you tend to be very trusting of others". This is true of me, but I have also learned how it can interfere with workplace situations. At times while at work I feel like I am on a tight schedule, and am very busy but try very hard not to show others that I do not have time for them, or am being impatient. I am happy to say that the score from my coworker also placed me at the people oriented level, but when she read the definitions of the different groups she said that she feels I am more content oriented. Being Content oriented is my goal in the workplace. My husband's survey also showed that I am people oriented, this did not surprise me at all.

Through the readings and surveys this week, as well as some life/work events that also happened this week I have learned a great deal. I need to ensure that I learn and put into place more of the content oriented listening style, and maintain my current styles for communicating. Although I feel I have a higher anxiety for communicating in public situations, or even small group meetings the ones I speak to or in front of feel that I am good at it and do not realize how anxious I feel. Also, I do not come off as being aggressive through my communication and that is something that I try to avoid, especially in the work place. I do feel that I need to speak up more, and be more of a leader in the workplace, as the way my coworker scored me seems to me as if I come off as being timid. These surveys have shown me a lot, and I think I will ask some of my other coworkers to complete them so I get a better idea of how others perceive me in the workplace.

Communication

•  Do you find yourself communicating differently with people from different groups and cultures?

         I do often find myself communicating differently with people from different groups and cultures. It is not something that I do purposefully, or intentionally, and many times I try not to treat people differently. On the other hand though I do feel that at times, it is necessary to treat people a little bit differently. Sometimes people have different needs, and in order to meet those needs you need to treat them differently. I also use more formal language when I speak with certain people like my boss, and some of my coworkers. With other people I use more informal language.

•  If yes, in what ways do you communicate differently?

One thing that I have noticed about myself is that sometimes I find myself using shorter sentences, or fewer words when I speak to people that I know do not have great confidence in speaking or understanding the English language. I learn this by speaking with them, and when possible, I have a translator available to assist with communication. I have also noticed this when speaking to people with special needs on occasion. I feel like I don’t want to come off as speaking in technical terms and have the person I am communicating with not completely understand what I am saying. I try to be respectful to everyone, and don’t always know the best way to communicate.

I know that there are some things that I can do to become a better communicator. One thing that I need to learn to do more effectively is to ask questions during a conversation to ensure that I am understanding what is being communicated to me. Another thing I should learn to do is to always remain focused on the topic being discussed, and not be so distracted by the little details.

What is communicated through body language?

As you have been learning, communication is not always straightforward. Everyone, at some time or another, makes assumptions based on messages communicated through body language and facial expressions.

This weeks assignment was to record a television show and watch it without sound in order to see what you can tell through their body language.

I chose to watch the show Lizard lick towing. I have seen this show before, but it is not something I would normally watch. It was actually a very amusing and entertaining show without the sound. There are three main characters in this show, but they come into contact with many other people as they repo, or attempt to repo vehicles. You could tell by the facial expressions of two of the characters, Bobbie and Ronnie, when they were plotting, or coming up with a plan. Their eyes were wide, they sometimes laughed, and when they thought they came up with a good plan they would both get very excited and start flailing their hands, and even jumping up and down. When the main characters, or the people getting their vehicles repo'd became angry they would clench their fists, yell, their faces would turn red, they would put their faces very close to the person they were yelling at, and they would point.

After watching the show again with the sound on I was correct in the assumptions that I had made regarding the feelings of the characters. I never before noticed how obvious it was to detect a person's attitude or feeling through body language. I did know that it was noticeable, however, at least with this show it was extremely obvious.

My Hopes and Goals...

• One hope that you have when you think about working with children and families who come from diverse backgrounds (any format and any length)

I hope that I get the opportunity to work with many children from all different backgrounds. I enjoy working with and learning about new people and hope to influence all of the children that I work with positively. I hope that someday I will even get the opportunity to work in another country with children and families. I think that would be such an enriching experience.

• One goal you would like to set for the early childhood field related to issues of diversity, equity, and social justice (any format and any length)

One goal that I would like to set for the early childhood field is to create a program that would offer preschool to all children and not be based on income, poverty level, needs, or place of residence that will prepare children for school. Head Start, and State funded preschools are good and enriching for children, but they are not available to all children. They are only available to low income children who qualify. This means that the "poor" children do not attend school with more children whose parents have a higher income. This is something that has always bothered me and had been hard for me to understand.

• A brief note of thanks to your colleagues

I would like to thank all of my classmates for the shared knowledge and personal experiences that they have shared during this last semester. I have had the opportunity to read a lot of personal stories about things that they have gone through throughout their lifetime, and had many genuine comments regarding stories that I have shared. It has truly been a great learning experience.

Ireland

You are working in an early childhood setting of your choice—a hospital, a child care center, a social service agency. You receive word that the child of a family who has recently emigrated from a country you know nothing about will join your group soon. You want to prepare yourself to welcome the child and her family. Luckily, you are enrolled in a course about diversity and have learned that in order to support families who have immigrated you need to know more than surface facts about their country of origin.

I am a teacher of a toddler classroom, and I have received word that I will be having a new child start in my classroom. I am going to have a two year old girl from Ireland. They are new to the country and this will be the first time that the child has been cared for outside of the family.

In order to prepare for this family I would want to familiarize myself with the Irish culture. I would also like to incorporate some things from their culture into the classroom. I can do this by doing some research, but also by speaking with the family. I could ask them what kinds of things would be representative of their specific culture, as well as ask them to possibly bring in some items to help the child feel more at home. This could be things such as clothing, music, books, or foods. I would need to be careful though as to not be stereotypical with the types of items that would be brought into the classroom. This is why I would like to ask the family for specific items related to their family's culture.

When have I encountered bias?

I have on occasion experienced bias in my life, but the time that I experienced the most bias was while I was pregnant, and during the first year that I had my first child. I got pregnant at 17 and had my first child when I was 18. I constantly heard people mumble under their breath about kids having kids, and how I would never amount to anything because I was so young. When I heard these things it was very hurtful because I already knew that I had made a mistake, and it was hard knowing that everyone else could see that I had made a mistake. The people who were talking about me made me feel like I was beneath them for what I had done, and that I was not equal with them. I have worked very hard to provide for my children and give them the best that I possibly could. I have also proved a lot of people wrong by getting an education and holding down a decent job.

Now I am proud to tell people that I had my first child while I was still a teenager. I hope to be a positive role model for teenagers who have children to prove to them that their life is not over, and they can still make something of themselves. I know getting pregnant or having children early in life is not the best option, but it is in no way the end. There is still time to fulfill your hopes and dreams.

Awareness of Microagressions

• Describe at least one example of a microaggression which you detected this week or remember from another time. In what context did the microaggression happen? What did you think and feel when you observed the microaggression or when you found yourself as the target of a microaggression?

There were a few examples of microaggressions throughout this last week, but the first one that comes to mind was when one of my coworkers asked another one of my coworkers to make her taco's because she wanted some good mexican food. It was all in good intentions, but the one that was asking for taco's pretty much just assumed that the other one was good at cooking mexican food because she was a mexican woman. The first thing that came to mind when I witnessed this was - wow, I just saw a micro aggression happen. The other coworker was not offended by the statement, but she very well could have been.

• In what ways did your observation experiences this week affect your perception of the effects of discrimination, prejudice, and/or stereotypes on people

My observations this last week did not really change my perception about the effects of discrimination, prejudice, and/or stereotypes about people, but it did make me much more aware of the little things people say during day to day conversations that could be possibly offensive to other, but it is completely unintentional.